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Sunday, April 09, 2006

My Ten Commandments

The following was paid for by John Brodigan for a Better America

I'm usually Mr. Happy Go Lucky, but much like all of you, there are a number of things people do that piss me off. So a while back I had posted my Three Commandments. From there it grew to five. Now, there are ten. And since I've grown tired of the news and have nothing else grinding my gears, I share them with you now...

(There were fifteen, but Moses dropped the tablet that had 11-15 chiseled on them.)

THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF JOHN*
*I reserve the right to make exceptions depending on how cute she is

1. Me having a cell phone does not put me at your beck and call. I'll answer it when I'm free and available to talk.

2. If I want your opinion on how I'm supposed to think and/or live my life, I will ask you for it.

3. Being my friend does not grant you unfettered access to my personal life. If I don't want to talk aboot it, so it is written.

4. If the group is doing something I deem to be boring or suck, I reserve the right not to do it.

5. If I ask a yes or no question, I expect a yes or no answer. Not an excuse or a dissertation.

6. It is okay to listen to Fall Out Boy. It is NOT OKAY to look like you listen to Fall Out Boy.

7. There are two types of people in this world: people who like a strong cup of coffee, and people who should just switch to decaf and stop complaining when I make the coffee too strong.

8. If I'm at the gym and have my headphones on, don't start a conversation with me.

9. The Good Lord gives us twenty four perfectly good hours a day, and unless you've got company, why waste them in bed?

10. Be excellent to each other.

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